Conquering the Runway of Life

From the front row of the Charleston Fashion Week runway, there is a contagious buzz in the air. You can feel momentum brewing for this week of fashion. On opening night, six semi-finalists have “won” their spot; that precious 10 minutes of showing their ideas to the audience. This audience filled with media, other fashion designers, store owners—any of which can change the career direction of these six hopefuls with one phone call, one write up, one simple order. Then, BAM! A hopeful young designer has a business.

WHOA! A Business. That is the goal, right? I pause to think of these creative, hopeful souls. They’ve just spent days, months, and countless late nights tapping into their creativity, technique, and execution. I think, WOW! What an experience, to have that moment of glory…the applause, the possibility. I couldn’t help but think, what separates the success stories from the one-minute wonders?

Here are three ways to steer any new direction in life, whether you are on the runway at Charleston Fashion Week, considering a new career direction, or simply looking to get more out of your current situation:

Get Clear! Write down a specific and measurable goal. Brainstorm what you want to take away from each conversation, from each interaction. Do you know what you hope to accomplish? Do you dream of being the next Marc Jacobs? Do you want to expand your customer base? Your actions will vary based on what you want to accomplish.

When you are clear, set an intention and think of it often. Think of your intention as the vehicle that will guide you to your goals. Your intention is bigger than a goal. It’s a purpose…a passion….It’s the “why” behind “why you are here.” Your goal may be 5 new customers, but your intention might be “to design wearable fashion that inspires women to embrace their self esteem, and feel confident and prepared to change the world.” We will all face some sort of rejection, but when you know you’re “why” the rejection will not matter, and you will attract those who ARE supporting your intention.

Be Courageous! When you are charting new territory, chances are, you are not going to feel comfortable. You are going to be in new places, with new people, and new feelings. No one reaches a new place with out embracing change. If you want something different, you have to be comfortable DOING something different. So, when you find yourself saying “I don’t know.” Shift that to “I don’t know, but I’m brave enough to find out!”

Get into Action! Momentum will serve you well.  Choose a target in your business or in your life and list five action steps that get you closer to that goal.  You will be amazed at how quickly life shifts when you set it in motion. 

Yoga tip: want find more courage? Do a pose you’ve never done before, like handstand, or headstand. Challenge yourself to be afraid, and see what that feels like. And know that you are ok. When you accept a simple challenge on the mat, your brain gets a little message “ah ha, you CAN handle scary situations” then your runway of life will be a little more manageable.

thanking myself out of shoulds and whys...a post-Valentines exploration of LOVE

Walking through Whole Foods there seemed to be an extremely large number of Flower purchases on Saturday. AH! Yes! Valentine’s Day! How could I forget? I stopped for a moment, pretending to look at the droves of chocolate assortments, but secretly catching glances with all of the faithful and diligent boyfriends and husbands purchasing flowers.
As I watch them selecting the various bouquets, I couldn’t help but think about the expectations we put on Love. Now that I think about it, my head is spinning. How many times have I expected the romantic dinner, the flowers, and the “I love you” post it note on my computer. Oh the boyfriends that never even had a chance, because it was always the next thing, the next trip, the next love letter. I was so busy fantasying about what was next; I didn’t even enjoy the moment. Oh yes, So many memories of useless expectations are now flooding my mind; there are simply not enough chocolates to distract me! I had to pause: STOP! And for all of the single ladies out there: BREATHE!!! Deep BREATH!
This “stinking thinking” is how it gets started. This is how the victim begins to creep in and take over. (or what Eckart Tolle calls the “ego”). First, it starts with observing the men in Whole Foods. Then, the emotion creeps in: “AW, FLOWERS, and How Sweet!” Then, it’s the fantasy of “what if I get flowers?” Then the reality: oh yeah, I don’t have a boyfriend. There it is: the truth.
For years, this is the place where I begin to attach all of the voices in my head. This is the place where the “shoulds” and “whys” start to creep into my head. But not this time!
This time, I softened my eyes, giggled to myself, and gave thanks right in the middle of the chocolate isle. Thanks to all of the boyfriends, girlfriends, wives and husbands who take time to love each other. Thanks for St. Valentine. Thanks for all of the strong and sexy single gals that have taught me how to embrace loving myself first! Thanks for the times that I feel so loved, and thanks for how differently love can drift in and out of my life. Thanks for the men in my life who DO know how to love, and who DO offer surprises and gifts, even when not prompted by a holiday. And thanks to all of the men and women who know how to take the truth and embrace. So, I don’t have a boyfriend, I don’t have a husband, and so it is. What truth about love are you ready to embrace?

Creating with Ease

Ever thought of creating something as a BIG OLE struggle? Artists speak of that overwhelming feeling of the BLANK canvas. Musicians struggle with songwriting; Graphic artists struggle with the layout of that next poster or website. So, Here's a thought: Why struggle to create anything?

My blog is inspired by the Episcopalian Priest, Richard Elliot, who spoke on Genesis 1;1-5. (even if you are not Christian, most are familiar with this first passage in the Bible, below)

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters, and God said, "Let there be light", and there was light. God saw that the light was good.

Ok, wait a minute. "let there be light" that's it? Is it that easy? Now, I chuckle. Because my creative mind takes off, and I think. Hmmm...What would the paragraph say if I were the "creator of light"??? Probably something like this:

Oh boy, light is a pretty big deal. Phew, wonder how many beings are going to depend on this light? How will the tone of the earth change? Will it be appreciated? Is there even a need for light in the first place? You get the drift...

So, I'm inspired by God's version of creation. As Richard says, "God doesn't stress out about the light, He just calls it forth." (by this point I was taking notes in the sermon and I'm starting to think..."WHAT THE HECK does that look like?" Calling forth?)

Here are my thoughts, I'd love yours!

1. Set intention.

2. Once inspired, commit to the inspiration, and honor your work (know, that it is good).

3. Know that it's not necessary to KNOW your Purpose. (native americans say "who are you to REALLY know your purpose? How will you ever know how many lives you touch? Even a smile, or a greeting could change someones day, or bring purpose to their life).

4. Follow your Heart. When your heart flutters, or sings, you are on your course.

5. Be inspired. Once you think of an idea, allow others to contribute. Take some suggestions, say "no thanks to others."

6. TRUST. The universe IS in divine order, so, What will be...will be.

SO, let's create this week. Create a haven in your home! Create a safe environment while driving. Create a new journal entry. Create your OWN blog :) and let me know what other CREATIVE inspirations you have on how to "call forth" and Create with ease.

Why not call forth your next project wth intention and trust?

5 Simple steps to create your Vision Board--create the life you want!

STEP 1
Gather your supplies
Poster Board Any size that inspires, some go smaller for travel, others larger for the refrigerator, or office
Magazines You can also use postcards, catalogs that are sent to your house, old birthday cards that are collecting dust; you can also grab old magazines from the library, or hair salons)
Glue Hint, Elmer’s will ripple your pages; I use rubber cement, glue sticks or tape
Scissors

STEP 2
Before you begin: Set your intention!
Set the ambiance: Choose a space where you are comfortable, turn on some nice music, light a few candles, turn off your cell phone.
Get Quiet: Ask yourself, what do you really want? Take a moment: Close your eyes, relax your shoulders, take a few deep breaths, let go of any expectation—there is no wrong way to do your vision board.

STEP 3
Gather your clippings
Begin sorting thru your magazines and such. It’s simple, if something speaks to you, makes your heart flutter, or makes you smile—cut it out and start a pile. Some of these things may be images of people, places, things, and others may be words or phrases. Gather first, no gluing yet.

STEP 4
Sort and Place
Begin to sort thru the images and place them on the board. If a picture or phrase no longer speaks to you, toss it out. Some pictures and phrases may relate to each other. Be open and use your intuition.

STEP 5
Glue and finalize
Glue everything on the board. You can add writing if you would like or paint.

And Finally, Be open, and HAVE FUN! :)

Save Yourself! What? Is that Necessary?

Oh, Here we go. I was initially appauled at Suze Orman's suggestion that women should learn to take care of themselves better. I thought, "Oh, that's just her generation beating their fists on the hip, liberated woman like me and you who run our life already!" I discounted the entire idea....UNTIL....WHOA! The heart wrenching episode of Oprah with women who lost it all.

Then, I got to thinking...I'm protected, right? I mean, I've made my fair share of mistakes (and still maneuvering a few of them). But I have insurance...I've recently even organized all of my bills!

I found myself silently (and embarrassingly) judging these women in relationships with men that control the money. There it goes! The BIG FAT YELLOW FLAG! My self-imposed "check yourself, girl!" that rings in my ear when I start to judge others. Anytime a judgment creeps in, I stop, I look at my life, And I learn....

So, I started reading Suze Orman's Women and Money. And, I'm shocked! I'm nowhere near the "save yourself" status! But I will be in 5 months! starting July, For those that want to join, just zip me an email, and I'll send you the summary of what we are doing each month.

No matter what age, or status: single, married, divorced, broke, wealthy, let's go for it!

Money is a part of our life, Let's get it out of the closet, Let's get taking! WITHOUT JUDGMENT ! and let's learn to depend 100% on ourselves! then all that extra support will just soar us to our dreams!

PS. the SUPER liberal side of me says, hey, if the men want to join in feel a need to save themselves, I'm sure some men would relate to these stories...And I don't discriminate :)

Stop Dieting and Be Your Perfect Size, Today!

That's it! I'm done with dieting! Just the thought of another "lose 10 lbs. in a month" advertisement makes me sick. There is always some great testimonial out there. Some thinner man or women, in a bathing suit or holding out there old oversized pants. These images haunt me. This is actually the stuff that pops in my head as I humbly try to embrace healthy habits!

These "overnight" transformations are anything but. Does weight watchers work, YES! Does Jenny Craig work, YES....Does anything work that you just put your mind to? YES!

But, personally, I'm done!

Instead, I prefer another image. An image of my body...exactly as it is now. I prefer to say yes to health...to healthy habits...Yoga, Walking, Pilates, Biking....Eating fruits, veggies, whole grains. Limiting Alcohol, Caffeine, and Sugars.

Is all that SO hard? Why not focus on the GOOD images. The image of a healthy body, walking; the thump of my heartbeat thanking me for giving it a little workout or a nice long and relaxing stretch after working out.

For years, I have seen models in magazines and tried to visualize MY body as magazine worthy. I have been inspired by friends that constantly maintain trim physiques. And, even more, those rare few that REALLY "rock" the confidence...This confidence from a place that doesn't care if the thighs are a wee bit larger this month.

Now, I wake up in the morning...and that voice in my head starts, "what will you look like in a size 8, or 6?" and I just shut her down! No more comparisons! No more day dreams of a perfect body! No more saving money for size 6 Couture!

Instead, I pause with graditude and commit to a healthy lifestyle today. And knowing, with confidence, that I embrace healthy choices and healthy additudes. I acknowledge my stress with compassion. And I believe in all of my heart that my figure will find its way to its perfect size, that size is to be determined by me and the natural course my body takes.

Spirituality: What does that have to do with me?

As we contemplate "spirituality," the vast array of options mixed with varying religious beliefs, Can leave some wondering WHY? or Where do I start? Freston, in the excerpt below, took the thoughts out of my mind, I am eager to share.



Chapter 2: The Eight Pillars of Wellness, from the book, Quantum Wellness by Kathy Freston

Spiritual Practice. Regardless of our particular spiritual orientation or religious affiliation, in our self-work we often come around to thinking about our souls and our spirits and what we are (or aren’t) doing to nurture them. Spiritual practice reminds us of what’s important. Even those of us who would say we are not religious can recognize that we are connected to some sort of deep and unified source, or what I will henceforth refer to as Spirit.
According to Webster’s dictionary, the original meaning of worship is a “state of condition of worth.” When you embrace worship, then, your aim is to embrace your real worth: the divine perfection that resides within you. No single religion or faith has a patent on this, of course. Whatever spiritual orientation you have, just be sure to build in some time for practice.
In my own life and my work, I have noticed again and again that when we don’t have any kind of spiritual practice, the ego tends to take over and gets us to thinking of ourselves as separate from the world, disconnected. Spiritual practice brings us back to our identification with something larger. It increases our capacity to love and be kind, both to ourselves and others. At its best, it is directed both inward (learning to love ourselves) and outward (learning to love others). Through spiritual practice---be it regular attendance at a church or a self-styled course of intensive reading in a particular tradition or philosophy—you learn that the more you can transcend the narrow focus of “me and mine,” the wider your circle of consideration can become. Thich Nhat Hanh, the Buddist monk and philosopher, says, “Without a spiritual dimension, we will not have the capacity to confront suffering, to transform suffering and to offer anything to life. A person without a spiritual path is a person walking in darkness. With a path, we are no longer afraid or worried.”
There are enough people who live and act in fear that our world is teetering on the brink of enormous change, and as I see it, the goal of any spiritual practice should be to shift the tide for each of us and the world from fear to love, from indifference to compassion. As we nurture the light within us, we can then shine it out onto the world.
As we grow in our faith, even if that just means acknowledging that there is more to life than meets the eye, we find ourselves more comfortable with our power and more directed in our purpose, and we are able to count on the support and guidance of a greater intelligence. Having a spiritual practice reminds us of life’s important truths: that we are all One, and that what we do to one person or being, we do to ourselves; that all of life is an expression of Spirit: and that at our truest, we are innocent and perfect. Sometimes you need to hear the truth a thousand times or in a thousand different ways before it begins to resonate, but it is still the truth. And putting ourselves in an atmosphere of constant coaching—through attending religious services or reading or praying alone or in a group—increases the velocity of our awakening.
If you do not currently have a spiritual practice, I have a couple of suggestions about choosing a teacher, a philosophy, or a place of worship:
1. Keep in mind the principles that you want to learn and embody
2. Steer clear of any school of thought that promotes distance, judgment, or ill will.

Many well-known and established religions have lost the mystical seed embraced by the great wisdom teachings: mercy, forgiveness, humility, benevolence, compassion, selflessness, and integrity. If you do not feel a genuine and widespread love for all people in a particular avenue of practice, consider going elsewhere. According to the system of spiritual development in “A Course in Miracles,” “A church that does not inspire love has a hidden altar that is not serving the purpose for which Spirit intended it”
Keep listening to your inner voice and decide if a teaching appeals to your core goodness or if it resonates with fear-based thinking. There is certainly no need to commit to and stay in one place only; nuggets of wisdom are everywhere you look, so feel free to explore different groups as you gather insights and inspirations.